And I Don't Have to Today!

I'm Waving! Can You See Me???

On On!

Spent last night having people do tequila shots out of my boobs - kinda messy - salt everywhere.

At the airport now, gotta run!

Happy Water Week

When Am I Ever Going to Pack?

My last class before vacation is presently watching Kung Fu Panda with Lia, so I'm getting some stuff done. And blogging, obviously.

Last night and today at lunch, as I was walking along the familiar streets I had an odd pang - homesickness for Canada and I'll the people I'll be seeing soon combined with a sense that I will actually miss my day-to-day life here, even if the absence is short.

Today I threw out my travel coffee mug. It's served me well for two years, but it's been leaking sporadically for the last three months or so.

I have huge weekend plans - a movie with Shawn tonight, rabies shot tomorrow, hashing with OBH3 since it's I Way Pee's last hash in Korea, Nut 'n Bone's birthday party, and then I'm off to the airport late Sunday morning. When I am going to fit in packing and cleaning, I have no idea!

I've set up some blogs for when I'm gone and I'll certainly try to blog from the road. I have a notorious reputation for neglecting to blog about trips - after all, it's sort of tedious to type up things you've already written in an actual journal. However, this time I commit not only to doing so, but also hopefully getting the trip to Boracay on here before the year is out.

Ciao, y'all. See ya in six weeks!

Rockin' Wednesday

I went to Yongsan Electronics Market and my head didn't explode - not only did I find what I needed in about ten minutes and cheap, I got the first two seasons of Battlestar Gallactica. Granted, I can't watch them until I get back, but everyone and their sister have been telling me to watch it. I also picked up Transformers 2 - not as good as the first one, but it was kick ass. Then we won at trivia. There was even a scavanger hunt section for which I ran like a mad freak down the road to the Family Mart to buy a pack of tampons and get a receipt for it. Shawn even showed up post-quiz.

But man, do I need more sleep.

Ghosts of Vacations Past - Asia

Taipei

To Taipei or Not to Taipei

Yep!

Boracay

Thailand with Lindsay

My first time

Thailand with Sheila

I Could Get Used to Boutique Airlines

In Lamai, Beach Awaits Tomorrow

North Korea

Brief reference to the trip.

Trip Time

Stuff

Coffee - agitated, energized sheep

Seriously?

Ava - "her teachers teased her for wearing a Gore-Lieberman T-shirt or reading Dude, Where's My Country? in homeroom.
If the innovation of cable news shaped the representation of the first Gulf War, then this war is partly being defined by another new form of media, one practiced by amateur diarists and commentators.
soldiers must register their blogs
"hand up your ass, you sad meat puppet", get raped, attention whore, a pig with lipstick, ugly little bitch

feminist mormon housewives (oxy-Mormon - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich)

Movies

Back when I thought I was moving, one of my goals was to watch all the DVDs I have lying around in order to get rid of any I didn't like. I've gone through four recently. Oddly though I've been inclined lately to avoid serious, it was the two serious movies that I enjoyed.

Milk made me cry. It's a startling movie to watch - Harvey Milk fighting to win a propisition denying gay civil rights when across America, and in California in particular, the same thing has been happening again. He was shot in the year of my birth, 1978, and for all that has changed, so much of the movie reminded me of now.

Frost/Nixon I had very low expectations for. Somehow I didn't think I'd find it particularly compelling and yet it was, completely. I have to admit to being sorely lacking in any real knowledge of American history - after all, I've picked up more teaching 4th grade social studies than ever before, I think. I hadn't realised just how fascinating I would find Nixon and Watergate and when you combine that with the look into the character of Frost, well, it was really, really good. Nixon published his memoirs in 1978 - odd how that came up twice in one evening.

A few weeks back I watched Memoirs of a Geisha. I can't even recall when or where I bought it, but considering how little I'd enjoyed the book (a love story about a girl sold into an institution that involves selling her virginity is not my sort of thing) I didn't have any great hopes for the movie. The best thing about it, in fact, was the scenery; it reminded me of my trip to Kyoto. I may actually keep it in case I ever want to bring back my weekend of geisha stalking and temple touring.

Rent, well, that one too I can't recall when I bought, though I've had it for some time. All I can say is, wait for the musical itself.

Movies & Dream

Back when I thought I was moving, one of my goals was to watch all the DVDs I have lying around in order to get rid of any I didn't like. I've gone through four recently. Oddly though I've been inclined lately to avoid serious, it was the two serious movies that I enjoyed.

Milk made me cry. It's a startling movie to watch - Harvey Milk fighting to win a propisition denying gay civil rights when across America, and in California in particular, the same thing has been happening again. He was shot in the year of my birth, 1978, and for all that has changed, so much of the movie reminded me of now.

Frost/Nixon I had very low expectations for. Somehow I didn't think I'd find it particularly compelling and yet it was, completely. I have to admit to being sorely lacking in any real knowledge of American history - after all, I've picked up more teaching 4th grade social studies than ever before, I think. I hadn't realised just how fascinating I would find Nixon and Watergate and when you combine that with the look into the character of Frost, well, it was really, really good. Nixon published his memoirs in 1978 - odd how that came up twice in one evening.

A few weeks back I watched Memoirs of a Geisha. I can't even recall when or where I bought it, but considering how little I'd enjoyed the book (a love story about a girl sold into an institution that involves selling her virginity is not my sort of thing) I didn't have any great hopes for the movie. The best thing about it, in fact, was the scenery; it reminded me of my trip to Kyoto. I may actually keep it in case I ever want to bring back my weekend of geisha stalking and temple touring.

Rent, well, that one too I can't recall when I bought, though I've had it for some time. All I can say is, wait for the musical itself.

Last night I had the oddest dreams, I think inspired by Frost/Nixon. I was interviewing important people, but there were unicorns and rainbows. Then I was woken up at 6 by a text message and was about to get all arsey with whoever sent it, but it was just my phone telling me my balance. Then I slept in late and only barely had time for coffee. It's going to be an odd morning.

They May Look Cute

But they really are the bane of my existence right now.

The Dollar Bill Made It Home

And I have new salt and pepper shakers.

It was an interesting weekend.

I didn't really do anything except eat and clean odd things (I really wish I had never moved that fridge...)

I Hearby Devote Myself to the Pursuit of Mad Science

Lunch Walks Among Us
I have a new hero. And a new thing I'd like to be when I grow up.

Attack of the 50-foot Cupid

Roses are red,
I play the kazoo,
Big Foot is hairy,
But much less than you.

Reading Franny K. Stein makes me want to watch old episodes of Pinky and the Brain.

Pimples are pinkish,
A clog is a shoe,
Turkeys are dumb,
And so are you.

And thanks to one of the Chapter titles, I have this stuck in my head: Love is a Battlefield.

Zombies are gray,
My toenails regrew*,
Oatmeal is lumpy,
Your family is too.

*It did, actually. Almost normal size now.

The Invisible Fran

"Butts are an imprecise science; errors occur."

Another brilliant mad science novel. I too want to own an electron microscope, a nuclear-powered brain amplifier, and a giant, flesh-eating koala.

The Fran that Time Forgot
And I thought two long middle names were bad.

I Think She Looks Hotter With the Ass, Myself

Rabies Shots

Are not the most fun way to spend a lunch break on a Friday.

Also, if I went to bed before midnight, why am I this tired today?

And I think I may have a slight addiction to the erotic spot-the-differences in the pictures pub game. Wacey and I did not get better at it with time, though, since we needed to order drinks in order to get the 500 won coins.

Word of the Day for Thursday, August 13, 2009

hebetude \HEB-uh-tood-; -tyood\, noun:

Mental dullness or sluggishness.

Delish!

I am remarkably good at making delicious meals out of what I find in my fridge. People still comment on the Mexican-contents-of-my-fridge dish from Shawn's hash birthday party.

Last night I was going to make a Greek salad, until I remembered that I lack both oil and onions. I did, however, have couscous and Italian dressing. So I chucked the tomatoes, cucumbers and feta cheese in with that and it was one of the best meals I've had in ages. And then I feel asleep before 9 pm.

I'm eating it again for lunch and it's Hump Day. Please let this week go fast.

I DON'T HAVE TO MOVE!!!!

And yes, I'm yelling about it on the Internet.

You know what this means?

I will actually have time to sleep before I leave. Not a lot of time, but anything more than 4-5 hours will be an improvement.

In other news, I bought a lot of tomatoes today. A lot.

Accidents - I've Had a Few

The Toe Saga, all collected up for your enjoyment.

Kitchen Disasters

The Toe

The Toe

The Toe

The Toe

The Toe/Foot

The Toe

The Zombie Invasion Hash

aka vaccination-on-trail hash.

Courtnie came up this weekend for Ray's on out and crashed at my place. We attempted to hit up four hashes in one weekend and would have made it if it weren't for the pancakes.

But, let's start at the beginning.



After two days of doing nothing but working (because even when I wasn't at work, I was speed reading Fellowship of the Ring and Treasure Island - thank Maude that ended yesterday), I was happy when Friday rolled around and it was the Full Moon Hash. I would have been happier had I been able to drink, but since I can't drink for three days after each vaccination and they seem to schedule the fuckers between 3-7 days apart, that's just not been possible. However, we went to the On After. No running because I didn't get off work in time - but I figure if I got the hash t-shirt, it freaking counts. Plus, I let a bunch of sweaty, smelly people hug me. And I had to fend off the lickers. Or perhaps Wacey was trying to eat my brains. You never know.



I went home before most of the crew, as I intended to actually go to YKH3 - since they run at 10 AM on a Saturday, I can't say I've been often. We managed to be late, which is rather impressive considering how near to the start point I live, but these things happen. The trail wasn't half bad - and wasn't even that steep, for all that whenever you are lost, you can generally count on whichever direction heads up being the right way - but, oh my Maude, the sweat. It was so damn hot. There were some hashers from Okinawa visiting and an On Out for Ober Beaver, so lots of fun. However the odd bit happened when the trail hit Itaewon - since it went by the International Clinic, I decided to wander in and get Rabies.



The shot, not the disease, obviously. It meant I was the SRB (Slowest Running Bastard or Be-otch), but as the girl who once got a monkey stuck in my hair, making sure I'm all vaccinated against rabies seems a bright move. I made it to the Down Down though and then after that was over, a bunch of us bused down to Songtan to run with OBH3.





And it was an awesome trail. Coming out of the Lion's Den, if there was an alleyway, we dodged down it. We climbed fences. We walked past all sorts of odd things, like the building above. We went through plenty of rice fields (and I thought I could skip the shot for Japanese encephalitis - perhaps I could reconsider, because I do spend more time in rice fields than I could ever have predicted...) In fact, at one point we followed trail around in a square - backwards! Oops. Must have been walking and chatting.





And then we hit... The Zombie Invasion Village. It was freaky. Eerie. Really, really odd. I can't quite describe the experience of a quiet, hot day, three girls, and then... that. Whatever that was. It looked at first like maybe there were just a couple of destroyed buildings as a result of a fire, but no. It went on for quite awhile and for the life of us, we couldn't come up with a good idea as to why so many things had just been left behind. In some of the houses there were still glasses in the cupboards, as if the residents all just up and walked off on day.







There were just the weirdest things we were passing by. Old stuffed animals, furniture, dead cats, wigs galore. Holes everywhere, only some covered and those not even well. It was possibly one of the coolest places I've been in Korea, actually. And so, so odd.





On this hash I learned what Constantine wire was - at the beginning, the walkers were told there was this point we could turn back, if the trail was taking too long. However, when we hit that point, we were 2 hours into the hash, in the middle of nowhere in a location that didn't look like it saw a lot of taxi traffic. We kept going and I'm glad we did - as running trails go, I can understand it would be a hard run, being so long. However, as a walking trail it was fantastic - interesting scenery and flat! That doesn't happen often at a hash.






We went an awful lot of places we possibly shouldn't have been. Traversed through a lot of farming areas, past some fairly big dogs (and I have two more shots to go before they can bite me at will), and by an air field. There was also a lot of beauty to look at.






We even exercised, in case two hashes in a day wasn't enough already. But I have to say, when the trail lead us to the subway station, I was quite pleased. It was time to get On On to the Down Down and some delicious flavoured alcohol.






That night we went back up to Evilwon. As it was Ray's On Out, there were plans afoot to go out. We danced in Soho (I had a blast, though I was basically sweaty from the time I got up to the time I went to sleep, with only perhaps about an hour post-shower when I didn't feel totally disgusting) and then went over to Bricx for a quick drink (and an intended hookah, but it didn't happen.)




Turns out, it was a Zombie themed weekend. Perhaps we can blame them for keeping us out until 5 and ruining the four-hashes-one-weekend plan, because all we did Sunday was go get pancackes at Butterfingers, nap, and have dinner at Geckos.

On On to the next weekend of hashing. If only there wasn't this damn work week to get through first.

Those Shoes Are Definitely Bi-Curious

Why has it taken me this long to watch 30 Rock? It's hilarious!

And Now, The Answers

1. We will blast the entirety of your land off the face of the earth with powerful attack capabilities beyond anything the world can imagine - a frightful attack beyond anything ever seen or heard! Kim Jong Il

2. Your time is up! Now you and your nation will pay for your arrogant refusal to obey me. Cobra

3. Citizens of the world: we have a power greater than any in the history of mankind. Look and tremble! Cobra

4. We will never miss the chance but certainly make them pay for the blood and turn the stronghold of the enemy into a sea of fire! Kim Jong Il

5. If we lose, I will destroy the world! Kim Jong Il

6. You have no hope of resisting our might. We control a new power, the raw strength of nature itself, against which there is no defense. Watch, watch as I unleash the sea and sky to do my bidding! Cobra

7. No! Not the spores! No! NOOOOOOOOO! Cobra

Friday Thoughts

1. Yawn.

2. Will this day ever end?

3. Franny K. Stein is my new hero. I want to be a mad scientist too.

4. To rabies or not to rabies?

5. Fellowship of the Ring is a long freaking book.

6. Am I too tired to go to the Full Moon Hash? Not sure.

7. I don't own any food at home. I'm hungry already.

8. Yawn.

9. YK hash tomorrow, maybe.

10. I wish I got off before 7:30/

11. Yawn.

12. I detest teaching kindie. Two more weeks might actually kill me.

Particularly Preposterous Packaging Day - August 7th

I intend to celebrate today's holiday with as much style and pizazz as I can manage.

And maybe hash and get rabies.

The vaccine, naturally.

Flashback to Childhood

In honour of the opening of the GI Joe film in Seoul today, I present you with this little quiz.

Read the quotes below and decide which come from Kim Jong Il's propaganda machine and which come from Cobra Commander, feared leader of the secret terrorist organization Cobra and arch-foe of G.I. Joe.

1. We will blast the entirety of your land off the face of the earth with powerful attack capabilities beyond anything the world can imagine - a frightful attack beyond anything ever seen or heard!

2. Your time is up! Now you and your nation will pay for your arrogant refusal to obey me.

3. Citizens of the world: we have a power greater than any in the history of mankind. Look and tremble!

4. We will never miss the chance but certainly make them pay for the blood and turn the stronghold of the enemy into a sea of fire!

5. If we lose, I will destroy the world!

6. You have no hope of resisting our might. We control a new power, the raw strength of nature itself, against which there is no defense. Watch, watch as I unleash the sea and sky to do my bidding!

7. No! Not the spores! No! NOOOOOOOOO!

What Were My Parents Thinking?!?

There is a reason everyone else within about 4 years in either direction of my age has the middle name Ann - it freaking fits on forms!

Like having two middle names and none of them very short wasn't already a pain in the ass in Canada, picture living in a country where everyone has a name that is THREE sylables long. My freaking first name is that long.

Another day of complicated and annoying paperwork done. About 8 million more bits of paper to go.

Anyone have any thoughts on the rabies vaccination?

I Never Thought I'd Say it But...

... I'm actually sort of looking forward to going off and getting a shot in the ass.

It is bound to be more fun than teaching my SK class.

I Also Have Paper Cuts

I think if I ever sneezed in the bank downstairs, they'd attach a copy of my alien card and passport to the Kleenex.

Wanna play a fun game? Go to a Korean post office and try to communicate that you want to buy stamps for a self-addressed envelope. The guy even insisted on writing my address out for me (sweet, really, as now it's in Korean) but we had to do a series of hilarious charades in order for him to figure out what the fuck I was going on about.

Dudes. My life is filled out in triplicate ten times over these days.

Fanta - It's What I Need

I don't understand the video below, but what has been getting me through two months of intensives has been:



I like shaking them. And the kids get all cute and jealous. And they are sugary shots of awake. I love the odd jello sensation and get really sad if I shake it wrong and get less jello than I feel I should.



Cheers to Sapporo Sarah.

Need a Laugh?

Awful Library Books has one for ya.

My Head Hurts

But my stomach is happily full of panang curry.

It's been a long fucking day. It started with me hitting snooze too many times to make coffee, so I had to make due with the shitty stuff at work. Then I went to a meeting to find out that my new SK class (who are so NOT senior kindergarten level at all) comes complete with Scary Korean Moms. Seriously? Why not tell me this more in advance of fifteen minutes before I start teaching? What extra stops do you really think I can pull out of my ass now? It was basically like teaching an open class - but in jeans! While jeans are very much an okay part of our dress code, I might have done crazy ass things like shaved my legs and worn a skirt had I known Scary Korean Moms, who had been harassing the desk staff for several weeks before the class even began, were going to watch through the window as I attempted to handle twelve students with material that is sooooo far above them it is almost enough to make me pull all my hair out in frustration (and I look really, really bad with short hair.)

Then there was the struggle to get Wednesday morning off - they really didn't want me to ask for a sub. I have subbed for others several times and frankly, I think I deserved a bit less arseness when I asked. However, I now have the spare time to go have a giant needle stuck in my ass. Oh, joys. Dudes, had I had any idea that there were only two places in all of Korea to get the yellow fever vaccination and that those two places only open on a couple of days a week for an hour per day, I would have been slightly better organized. See, thing is, I though I HAD an appointment for a yellow fever vaccination, but it turns out she just meant she'd HELP ME MAKE the appointment when I got my other vaccinations. ARGH. Seriously.

Then at 6 p.m., just as I was about to make my escape, the staff came and asked if I could work on Thursday and Friday, from 6-7:30 (AHHHHH! Nooooooooooo! But I can't say no because I just got Wednesday morning off, fucking hell) to teach Treasure Island and The Fellowship of the Ring. I guess I should take it as a compliment that the staff consider me either A) that well read that I've read every book imaginable (I swear, they never fail to look less than startled to death whenever I say I'm not familiar with anything in English - and I don't even have a freaking English degree!) or B) think I read that fucking fast. They don't even have the book for me yet! I get it tomorrow. Guess what I'll be doing all Tuesday and Wednesday evenings. Bleh.

Though it turns out the student requested me personally. So, assa! I may have a sore head, but I kinda feel like 100 million won at the moment.

Plus, due to a change according to my charming contact at the Ghanaian Embassy, I now, suddenly, need $2000 more than she told me not even a month ago in my bank account for a tourist visa. (Don't even ask why I need that kind of money when I can reportedly get by like a queen on $100 a week - it will make your head hurt as much as mine.) However, travel being the kind of activity that makes me trust in the inherent goodness of people, my coworker has kindly offered to transfer the cash into my account long enough for me to get a bank letter. Seriously awesome - while he knows where to find me and all and I'd totally do the same for people, it's still a reminder of just how amazing people can be.

So, my head may hurt, but life is all working out, albeit in its normal bumpy way. Plus, True Blood kicked ass this week!

Song Dong

Info here.

Answers for the Geek Readership

First Lines
1. Kafka, The Trial
2. Milton, Paradise Lost
3. Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451
4. Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby
5. Pynchon, Gravitys Rainbow
6. Danielewski, House of Leaves
7. Dante Aligheri, The Divine Comedy
8. Tolstoy, Anna Karenina
9. Gibson, Neuromancer
10. Dostoevsky, Note From The Underground

Current Events

1. Propofol (Diprivan)
2. Felipe Massa
3. Nicolas Sarkozy, she was riding on the back of a police scooter
4. Herbivorous Boys
5. George Mitchell & Saab Ereka
6. She had taken it on holiday and it was stolen
7. Birthers
8. $1 +1% of sales.
9. Zlatan Ibrahimovic
10. They’ve asked their daughters to plow the fields naked

Quotes of the Recently Dead

1. Walter Cronkite
2. Robert McNamara
3. Karl Malden
4. David Carridine
5. Roh Moo Hyun
6. Jade Goody
7. Ricardo Montalban
8. Harold Pinter
9. Paul Newman
10. Alexander Solzhenitsyn

The Book Review Club (August 2009)

So, I've been meaning to do this for months and I'm finally about to get my shit together in time! Woot!

A couple of months ago I borrowed Son of a Witch by Gregory Maguire from a friend and she mentioned that I might like a book that was an interpretation of Alice in Wonderland, but she couldn't remember the title off-hand. A couple of weeks later, another friend bought the book, The Looking Glass Wars, by Frank Beddor and then finished it on the train ride home from Mudfest and handed it to me. Since I've been working like crazy and obsessed with vampire porn (as anyone on my Facebook profile could hardly miss), I only just this week got around to reading it.

I'm so glad I did. I liked it a lot more than Son of a Witch and possibly more than Wicked. Granted, I now very much need to actually read Lewis Caroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass.

Here's what Visual Bookshelf on Facebook says about The Looking Glass Wars:

You know the myth...

A little girl named Alice tumbled down a rabbit hole and proceeded to have a charming adventure in the delightful, made-up world of Wonderland...

Now discover the truth... Wonderland Exists!

Alyss Heart, heir to the Wonderland throne, was forced to flee through the Pool of Tears after a bloody palace coup staged by the murderous Redd. Lost and alone in Victorian London, Alyss is befriended by an aspiring author to whom she tells the violent, heartbreaking story of her young life only to see it published as the nonsensical Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. Alyss had trusted Lewis Carroll to tell the truth so that someone, somewhere would find her and bring her home. But Carroll had gotten it all wrong. He even misspelled her name! If not for royal bodyguard Hatter Madigan's nonstop search to locate the lost princess, Alyss may have become just another society woman sipping tea in a too-tight corset instead of returning to Wonderland to fight Redd for her rightful place as the Queen of Hearts.

Meet the heroic, passionate, monstrous, vengeful denizens of this parallel world as they battle each other with AD-52's and orb generators, navigate the Crystal Continuum, bet on jabberwock fights and travel across the Chessboard Desert.

The Looking Glass Wars unabashedly challenges our Wonderland assumptions of mad tea parties, sleepy dormice, and a curious little blonde girl to reveal an epic battle in the endless war for Imagination.

The first thing that struck me was the illustrations because the card soldiers seem ripped straight out of the recent Star Wars trilogy. Beyond that jarring flaw, I loved this book more for its plot than its characters. Alyss seemed well drawn and credible, though I found Redd and Dodge Anders to be less so. I loved the way Beddon connected real world events and events in Wonderland - the timeline was interesting, though perhaps I'm alone in my geeky love of timelines. I loved Hatter Madigan and his kick-ass weapons. I missed entirely that General Doppleganger was Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum - I have Carroll's books back in Canada and intend to bring them back with me before reading the next two parts of Geddor's trilogy.

The theme of the book, which deals with issues of anger, revenge, power and justice, rather hits you right over the head in terms of obviousness - while I find that more common in books for children and young adults, in comparison with Phillip Pullman's Dark Materials trilogy I think Beddor could have been a bit more subtle. That said, it was easy for me to draw parallels with the real world and other literature, such as the connection to North Korea and 1984 with Redd's use of constant broadcasting to control the Wonderland population.

I think this would be an enjoyable book to teach and I suspect my students would really enjoy it, as well. I look forward to reading the next two books.

July is Ending

2. Read 101 books. (88/101) Flow, Lord of the Flies, The Great Gatsby, The Old Man and the Sea, The Catcher in the Rye, Tumble Home, City of Thieves, Dead Until Dark, Zen and the Art of Vampires, Even Vampires Get the Blues, The Looking Glass Wars
3. Read 50 children's books. (38/50) Nate the Great and the Missing Key, Dear Mr. Henshaw, Ruby the Copycat, Lunch Money, The Annoying Team, Case of the Elevator Duck
5. Spend 30 days reading out of the house for at least one hour. (20/30)
8. Read all the magazines in my place.I really must get on this before I move.
12. Complete a month of posts each year (NaBloPoMo or other month.) (6/3)
19. Be able to label a map of Africa.
23. Win at any of the quiz nights.
57. Eat at 25 new restaurants. (15/25)Korean place in Boryeong, Scrooges, Sam Ryans
62. Dip my toes into two oceans/seas. (1/2)Yellow Sea
76. Take the subway to or from work once a week. (35/38)
84. Finish all my multivitamins.
90. Go to bed by midnight thirty times. (5/30)
95. Make one day a month internet and TV free. (20/30)

Oh.My.Maude

Facebook Status Archetypes

Social networking is a paradox because usually the people who are the most active online are the least active in real life. At least that's a common criticism. Is it a fair assessment?

Or else they just have a lot of down time at work which isn't quite long enough to do anything else of value. In my five minute breaks, unless I need to pee or fill my water bottle, I tend to log on to Facebook and fart about for the four minutes remaining. Since I don't have the interent at home, I tend to like going on at work because the only other time I use it is to watch True Blood or Weeds online while reading blogs or sending emails, which only happens twice a week. This is also why I take so many idiotic Facebook quizzes - they fit nicely into one break, are amusing enough, and are a very much needed mental break from children.

The article is fairly amusing, if nothing original. If you've got five minutes, maybe you'll read it or mabye you're too busy updating your Facebook status.

Face it: When you get pregnant, you're not going to tell your best friend over Facebook. No, the "Big News Break" update specifically targets people who aren't among the inner circle of friends. But we're not knocking it. Facebook is all about lesser friends, and there's nothing wrong with second-tier.

I think I just might, should I ever get knocked up (and since that would be a big accident, I won't have told anyone about any plans or anything. My parents better get on Facebook, you know, just in case.

Random Vacation Days

The summer vacations at my hagwon are just odd. We get the last two days of July off and then the last week of August off (sort of.) There is technically a meeting on that last Friday of August, but if you are going anywhere, you get to just skip it and while Thursday is not an actual holiday, it's a day without classes or any need to be at work. Weird, right?

Sadly, though I have these next two days off, I'm up as early as usual in order to fill in paperwork and hang out with visa people. To that I say, meh.

Wanna Quiz Along at Home?

Whether you might want to or not, I'm too damn tired to write anything else today. Answers to follow.

First Lines

1. "Someone must have slandered Josef K., for one morning, without having done anything truly wrong, he was arrested."
2. "Of man's first disobedience, and the fruit
Of that forbidden tree, whose mortal taste
Brought death into the world, and all our woe,
With loss of Eden."
3. "It was a pleasure to burn."
4. "In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since."
5. "A screaming comes across the sky."
6. "This is not for you."
7."Half way along the journey of our life, I found myself again in a dark wood, Where the straight road no longer lay"
8. "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."
9."The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel."
10. "I am a sick man . . . I am a spiteful man."

Current Events
1. What was the drug, allegedly administered to Michael Jackson by his doctor, that may have killed him?
2. Which Formula One driver suffered a near fatal 150mph crash this week?
3. Which Head of State was hospitalized this week? For a bonus point, how did his wife arrive at the hospital?
4. The growing trend among Japanese men for shunning career employment and competition and avoiding marriage has led to its adherents being given what nickname?
5. What are the names of President Obamas Middle-East envoy and the Palestinian Chief Negotiator?
6. How has an official limousine gotten the German Health Minister into trouble this week?
7. What name has been given to the conspiracy theorists who allege that Barack Obama is not an American citizen, despite massive evidence to the contrary?
8. Rock legend Jimi Hendrix’s first recording contract was put up for auction in New York this week. How much was it worth?
9. In Football, Barcelona traded 40 million pounds and striker Samuel E’to for which Inter Milan player?
10. Farmers in the East Indian state of Bihar have taken what extreme step to induce the weather gods to bring a badly needed monsoon?

Words of the Recently Dead
1. I regret that, in our attempt to establish some standards, we didn't make them stick. We couldn't find a way to pass them on to another generation, really.

2. Neither conscience nor sanity itself suggests that the United States is, should or could be the global gendarme.

3. He sent you a priest, a rabbi and a quaker, Mr President, not to mention his son Jesus Christ. What do you want from him?

4.You're not a bad person. You're a terrific person. You're my favorite person, but every once in a while, you can be a real cunt.

5.When I saw their horrified eyes and their missing toenails, my comfortable life as a lawyer came to an end.

6. [Discussing peacocks]:
You see those things... don't think I'm being daft... but them things that look like eyes, are they their real eyes?

7.I've done far worse than kill you, Admiral. I've hurt you. And I wish to go on hurting you. I shall leave you as you left me, as you left her; marooned for all eternity in the center of a dead planet... buried alive! Buried alive...!

8.I made a terrible mistake when I was young, I think, from which I've never really recovered. I wrote the word "pause" into my first play.

9. What we've got here is a failure to communicate.

10.If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?

Vienna Teng

All I did yesterday after teaching was watch True Blood, meet up with TOT for beers and Tandoori chicken at Jacoby's (so not at all like Tandoori chicken, but delicious), and then take her back to my place to crash before her incredibly early flight to Jeju. Since I don't have much to say about that or any interest in doing my intended weekends recap post, have this instead.

City Hall


Homecoming


Gravity

Lazy Sundays

I went down to Jeonju for the weekend to hash - and hash we did, on Saturday. After the hash we drank quite a lot of soju & beer, went out for dukgalbi with cheese (yum!), saw a band and went to a club. During the hash the virgins were supposed to keep ahold of a balloon and not break it - mine popped as I blew it up, though the penalty wasn't too bad. Ray found a suitcase during trail that he carried the rest of the way, with his balloon up his shirt. He certainly confused more than a few Korean passers-by. Sunday we were incredibly lazy - we went to the start point, politely joined in circle and then hashed ourselves over to the Loteria for some fast food for breakfast. After that we sat in front of a Mini Stop for a couple of hours while three people did trail and eventually I threw myself onto a bus heading to Seoul and read a new vampire author. When I got home, I watched two movies: A Touch of Pink and Open Your Eyes. A Touch of Pink was sweet and just felt so Canadian. I wasn't too impressed with the acting, but the story line was interesting. Open Your Eyes was just bizarre all round. Then, just before midnight, I went to bed.

Jeonju Roadtrip

This is what I am up to this weekend.

Thoughts on Books

There are few things in life I enjoy more than books. I even like talking about books, so I'm going to address one of my comments in an actual post. In the comments, Ray said:

hmm. So I went through that Meta-list of 100 best books ever. Do you agree with those? I've read at least 35 of them if not more... and there are definitely a bunch of books that I'd include onto that last.

What does it say about newer authors--- your work has to be OLD in order to be considered the best.

Hmm.

I've mentioned before on this blog that when I was in high school, I used to feel (quite sullenly, no doubt) that some of the symbolism my teachers blathered on about was totally made up. As I've gotten older and better read, I realise that the one of the problems back in high school is that I just couldn't make the necessary connections between texts or see the patterns in novels on my own. Because I was an arsey little shit (I'm not sure much has changed), I didn't like being told how to interpret what I read and since I couldn't see it for myself I tended to just not like what I was made to read. For example, in a project on genres in 11th grade, I did dystopian novels and my favourite was Walden Two by B.F. Skinner largely because the teacher hadn't read it and didn't comment on how I should interpret it at all.

On the list, I've read twenty, started several or studied parts of them at university, and only really hated one. I seldom don't finish novels, but The Wind in the Willows is a book I can distinctly remember not finishing as a child, I gave up on the King James Bible at the begats, stopped reading War & Peace because it was too heavy to take on a hiking trip and I'd forgotten too much by the time I got back (I did love it, so I certainly intended to tackle it again one day), and I'm not entirely sure I've covered the entire Illiad and Odyssey, though I've studied some parts intensely and translated a fair amount as well. The only one I've actually hated was Beloved - I really want to like Morrison's novels but I just don't. I've now taught four of the novels on the list too, and that was an incredible experience.

I think Ray is right - the lack of more modern books is noticeable. What I also noticed is that the newest books were Pullman's Dark Materials Series - I loved them, but I do wonder at them being the best of all newer works. The reason I don't object to the list, however, or the age of the books, is that I think that reading the classics is essential in order to fully understand many newer works and the older I get, the more I enjoy being able to feret out the connections. Intertextuality kind of rocks.

For sure, I would love to read every last book on that list (minus perhaps the other Morrison, though I do mean to force myself through at least one more of her books, as perhaps she'll grow on me.) It's not a bad start, I think.

That said, I'm presently reading some vampire porn, a young adult novel, and Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell (which also is handy as a paperweight and for strengthening my purse-carrying muscles.)

Check One Thing Off the To-do List

I have flights! I have to spend a random day in Rome, however that turns out to work awesomely as Jen is going to be there too that day. Then three weeks in Ghana/Togo, two weeks in Toronto (with a sidetrip to Kingston planned) and three full days in Vancouver.

Please, please let these 18.5 days of work fly by, but let all my free time go slowly enough for me to work out the rest of the details!

Life Rules for Geeks - And the Rest of You

Some of these are really funny.

And some geek awesomeness.

Or perhaps you'd like to compile your summer reading plan. Or maybe for longer.

Dudes, I am so tired and I have to go home and then to Itaewon, but I think it's getting me a seriously cheaper flight.

Korea Beat Goes Undercover

In lesbian clubs. Sigh.

The article is, considering everything, not as horrible as it could be and they politely changed the names of the clubs, which are fairly far from the rest of the club scene, only allow women in and don't all pictures. They used to be considerably more secret when I arrived in Korea but have slowly become better known even outside the LGBT community. The comments are a disaster - granted, most internet article comments are. I particularly like the guy that claims that there aren't any hetero clubs in Korea that are as hedonistic - seriously funny, as in my experience they are worse. Some homophobia, some ignorance, some implications that foreigners in Korea aren't interested in anything but sex. I suppose this would be why I am selective about my internet reading and seldom read any comments (though I do read the ones on my own blog!)

Chosun Weekly Checks Out Lesbian Clubs in Hongdae
One writer for the weekly magazine spent a night in the less well-known side of Hongdae.

Unlike gays, lesbians have not been publicly visible. Gays are known to gather mainly in Jongro3-ga and Itaewon, while the lesbian community has no famous spot. But upon hearing that near Hongdae Station there were four or five “lesbian-only clubs”, I went straight there to see for myself.



00:00 Over 100 Women… No Reservation, No Seat

Situated between some normal residences in Hongdae, P Hall draws the eye with its conspicuous pink sign. After you take the stairs down to the second floor and let the women employees check your ID card, a strip of pink paper is attached to your wrist. You’re in P Hall.

The cover fee for P Hall is W10,000. Usually you can get a reservation after 9 pm, and those who don’t stand around since there are no open seats. Those with reservations sit on three-person white fur sofas in the seven or eight “VIP Rooms”.

It’s past midnight but the 500㎡(150평) club was packed with about 100 women. In the middle of the club there was a dance stage, and on one side of the floor there were several mattresses scattered around as a white “bed”. On the bed six or seven women were lying down and flirting.

Everywhere there were people on the lookout for men. “So men are not allowed in?” I asked the permed owner, a woman in her mid-20s. “Of course not,” she replied. She was a “woman” in short hair and skinny jeans. Her shirt was one size too large, and there was no volume to her chest as if it had been compressed with bandages.

She said, “lesbians with short hair who take the man’s role are called ‘butch’.” Lesbians who taken woman’s role are called ‘femme’.

01:00 “Love at First Sight” Asked to Sit Together

One woman ordered a cola at the bar next to the stage and walked over. 160cm tall and wearing black horn-rimmed glasses, she was young with short hair. She introduced herself as 20-year old Kim, studying physical education at women’s university H. I gave her my phone number and went over to sit with four or five of her friends. Immediately I received a text message. She sent me five or six messages saying, “it’s love at first sight,” “do you have a lover?”, and “how do you feel about younger women?”

As soon as I went over to her seat her friends allowed me in. “Who are your friends here?” I asked. She laughed and said, “they’re all friends I met at lesbian internet clubs, but they all have girlfriends. Wouldn’t it be sad to live without a lover?”

02:00 Loud Music Draws Them In… Some Couples Head to Motels

As the singer launched into “Saturday Night” the women cheered. My eye was drawn to the couples dancing lasciviously. Like in any other club in Hongdae, one woman sat on another’s lap and whispered into her ear, another ran her hands over her partner’s whole body, and another held a beer bottle in one hand and ghad her other around her partner’s waist.

Cigarette smoke hung in the hair and I left the club. One couple next to me talked. “Well… wanna go?” “Yeah, let me get some cash. That motel doesn’t take credit cards.” They left the club and disappeared up the street.

Other couples leaned against the entrance, drunken and getting physical. One couple, who had been dancing furiously on stage 10 minutes before, was composed of a black woman and a Korean woman. They had their hands around each other’s waists and left after whispering passionately.

I asked Kim about one-night stands. She said, “just a minute ago some of my friends went to a motel together. It’s dirty, like having sex with a man.”

After leaving Kim I went back into the club. Another woman had arrived. 167cm tall and dressed casually, she was a prototypical beauty with crescent-moon eyes and rosy cheeks. She was a 24-year old nursing student named Goh who took me by the hand to the bathroom. Two of her friends came in. They all said, “you’re the prettiest one here!” “Notice that a minute ago everybody was only checking you out?”

03:00 “Do Your Parents Know? Mine Would Faint!”

Goh’s friends moved to their seats and had a drink before leaving. I went with them to M Bar, a lesbian-only bar. Located in a basement level, M Bar has a bar and 12 tables in a space that can accommodate 500. Though very late, it was still half full.

Goh, who wsaid she has an older sister and younger brother, said, “just my sister is straight, and me and my brother are gay.” I asked if her parents know she is a lesbian. She laughed and said, “if my mother knew she would faint. I just told them my sexual orientation by saying I’m not interested in marriage.”

Goh said, “the problem of life is living with someone you can be happy with, and being gay has nothing to do with it. Straight or gay, everyone goes through pain over it, so I don’t really think about it.”

04:00 Almost All Employees Are Women… In Daytime You Can Bring Gay Friends

I arrived at S Club, another lesbian-only club in Hongdae. Located in the first basement floor, on the last Saturday of each month patrons can bring their “gay” friends, and it is well known for this special night. I paid the W10,000 cover fee and went in, and the manager, a handsome woman in her 30s, greeted me with a smile.

I sat at the bar near a part-time worker, a woman with a white face and dyed-blonde permed hair. She said she was 20-year old Kim, and had been working there since February. She said, “I started working here after I saw an ad on a lesbian community internet site.”

She said she was actually bisexual. She first began wondering about her sexual orientation in high school. “When I was a second-year student in high school I met one of my younger girl classmates, and I asked her out and we dated for a year. But our homeroom teacher found out and threatened to tell our parents if we didn’t stop hanging together. My girlfriend was very upset and said we should break up.” After she graduated she dated a man. Now she has no partner.

05:20 Lesbian Employees Come and Go “Keep In Touch…”

It was 5 am and patrons were starting to leave the club. One customer in hr 20s asked an employee for her phone number, and the employee flirted, “come again and I’ll treat you nice.”

One employee with unusually large eyes and a vivacious personality left with this reporter. She asked for my phone number, saying “you don’t have to tell me your name or anything… I just like you. Come again and see me.”

And This Is Why...

... the classic novels aren't dead. They remain disturbingly pertinent.

19. Be able to label a map of Africa.

I've spent spare minutes all week memorizing it and now, fuck yeah! I did the whole thing perfectly, even the spelling and the islands and 'stans. Up next - South & Central America. Minus the Caribbean - that would do my head in!

Planning Ahead Pays Off

This t-shirt is officially on my Christmas list.

North Korea Threatens Nuclear Attacks, But This Is What We Should Concentrate On

So, here I am, sitting on the Internet at work after teaching what I think may be the most annoying child in all of Korea. I'm not kidding. Four years, most annoying hour of my life so far. However, I'm on a break now, so I'm farting around until I get hungry for lunch, at which point I will go out and sit in the sun. And I came across this article.

Korea Herald [EDITORIAL] Nation branding

Korea will stop being described as "dynamic" or "sparkling," at least on the government level. "Miraculous Korea" is being considered as a candidate national slogan by a special panel working on improving the nation's image.

The "Dynamic Korea" catch phrase, which has been used in official publications from around the time of the 2002 FIFA World Cup Korea-Japan, is feared to remind outsiders of violent demonstrations in this country. "Korea, Sparkling," another slogan coined by the Korea Tourism Organization, sounds like a commercial message for mineral water in the opinion of Euh Yoon-dae, chairman of the Presidential Council on National Branding.

The council, which came into being last January under President Lee Myung-bak's instruction to promote Korea's image abroad, plans to hire a foreign company to create a new national slogan to replace the old ones. Chairman Euh, an economist who was president of Korea University, seems to favor "Miraculous Korea," which he believes denotes Korea's economic success, particularly in the areas of technology.

True, a recent government-commissioned survey with a large number of foreigners has determined that "advanced technology" is the primary image that is conjured up when they think of South Korea. That is followed by Korean food, television dramas, the people, overall economic growth and the still persistent image of the Korean War. It makes sense that the presidential council seeks to emphasize an area where Korea has already established a positive image in the international community.

While we appreciate the efforts of President Lee and the presidential council to enhance Korea's "brand power," we wonder how much a single catch phrase can formulate a better image of Korea among foreigners and encourage them to buy more Korean products and take vacations here. We remember Thailand and Malaysia, for example, made big international publicity efforts with such tourism promotion catch phrases as "Fantastic Thailand" and "Malaysia, Truly Asia," we do not know if Japan and China had such national slogans.

Korea is not alone in wanting to improve its national branding in this age of indefinite global competition. With official or semi-official establishments, nations make meticulous international publicity efforts by creating fancy logos and circulating catchy slogans to attract overseas attention. Their aim is to induce foreign investment, bring in more foreign tourists and increase exports. Hosting Olympic Games, the World Cup or the World Expo may be the ultimate in national branding exercises.

But the members of the national branding council and other government authorities should realize the limits of such "overhead" national publicity, which can be rather counterproductive when overused or overemphasized. Wise investors and sophisticated international tourists are more affected by the footage of clashes in Seoul Plaza than by repeated chants of "Miraculous Korea" on CNN.

We believe diversity is the best thing in today's publicity war. Samsung, LG and Hyundai have yet to take the trouble to disclose the national origin of their cell phones, LED TVs and passenger cars in their ads but by far they are the most powerful instruments of Korea's national branding as the government survey has proved. Starting the complicated job of increasing Korea's brand power by coining a new catchphrase is a naive approach

2009.07.21

It's pretty funny really. Each of the Korean cities and even some of the neighbourhoods also have one word English slogans, and generally ones that make no sense whatsoever. We had a quiz round on them once which turned out to be a guessing disaster, even though two of our teammates are quite well-travelled around Korea. I highly doubt that a new adjective is going to do anything at all for Korea's reputation. One of the few things I think that Korea maybe could do is clean up the ESL industry. After all, most people have a frame of reference for South Korea that includes the Korean War and North Korea. Before I moved here the only other thing I knew was that my friend Candace had worked here and basically hated it. If you google Korea, you fast come across places like Dave's ESL Cafe, and if you were to go by the portrait those posters paint of Korea... Well, wow is all I can say. Perhaps protecting the basic rights of the foreigners here in the country and working to combat racist attitudes (Teacher! Africa people eat people! Really! All of them!) might be a more logical way of building a positive image outside of Korea. Korea really is a great country and on the whole, most of the Korean people I've come across have been great too. However, the bad eggs certainly are spotlighted on the Internet.

(Gotta love the Korea Herald. When I used the spell check, the only mistake that it found was in the article!)

Happy Monday!

I had such a nice, lazy weekend. Yes, yes, there are about a millions things I should have gotten accomplished. That part was not so good, I guess. However, I went home Friday night and I put on Harold & Kumar Go to Whitecastle (and wished very much I had some of what they were smoking), ate chili with hotdogs (I am making quite the concerted effort to clean out those cupboards), and then started the book club novel, City of Thieves. It turned out to be absolutely fantastic - the incredible discriptions of how cold and hungry they are during the seige of Leningrad, I actually turned off my air-con for a bit. Best novel I've ever read about a quest for a dozen eggs. Then I slept in Saturday, made myself a fantastic omlette, plowed through Lunch Money (kids' book and really quite good) and started in on Jonathon Strange & Mr. Norrel, in between naps. I finally watched Babel - fantastic scenery - and all that searching for a connection was poignant (especially after Catcher in the Rye, which is about a search for connection, but I don't much like the book). I went to bed fairly early, woke in time to shower and head to Flying Pan Blue for some fabulous Eggs Benedict with smoked salmon and then over to Bunglow to drink margaritas, talk about the book, and squish sand through my toes. We went to pick the next book (The Yiddish Policemen's Union) which I already own and I traded in books (so sort of an errand run). I then ran a real errand and dropped my happy coat off to be embroidered before heading to hang with a tiny group of hashers at Sam Ryan. The evening ended with ice cream. I have to say, it was a pretty damn great weekend. More on my recent (and more action packed) weekends sometime this week... I've been procrastinating.

How can you not love a song that mentions Minoans?

N. Paradoxa

It's a cool blog.