I Hearby Devote Myself to the Pursuit of Mad Science

Lunch Walks Among Us
I have a new hero. And a new thing I'd like to be when I grow up.

Attack of the 50-foot Cupid

Roses are red,
I play the kazoo,
Big Foot is hairy,
But much less than you.

Reading Franny K. Stein makes me want to watch old episodes of Pinky and the Brain.

Pimples are pinkish,
A clog is a shoe,
Turkeys are dumb,
And so are you.

And thanks to one of the Chapter titles, I have this stuck in my head: Love is a Battlefield.

Zombies are gray,
My toenails regrew*,
Oatmeal is lumpy,
Your family is too.

*It did, actually. Almost normal size now.

The Invisible Fran

"Butts are an imprecise science; errors occur."

Another brilliant mad science novel. I too want to own an electron microscope, a nuclear-powered brain amplifier, and a giant, flesh-eating koala.

The Fran that Time Forgot
And I thought two long middle names were bad.