Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Hash Songs - The Basics

The Basics

Blessing the Hares
Bless these hares,
Bless this trail,
Copus no catch us,
Ajoshi no shoot us,
Dogus no bite us,
Shiggy please shag us,
Coitus no-interuptus,

The Hairs ("The Mayor of Bayswater") 
And the hairs... (and the hares) 
And the hairs... (and the hares) 
And the hairs of her dickey di-do hung down to her knees..... 
One black one, one white one, and one with a little shite on, 
And one with a little light on, to show us the way. 

She's not a great looker, but everyone took 'er 
You'd need a coal miner to find her vagina 
If she were my daughter I'd have them cut shorter 
She lived by the waterfront, with the waves lapping up and down her cunt 
She married an Italian, who was hung like a fucking stallion 
She divorced the Italian and married that stallion
I folded her lips back, and there found a six-pack 
I drank down that six-pack and put all the empties back
It always was hit-or-miss, could I find her clitoris 
I reached into her thing, and there found my class ring 
I flicked it, I licked it, I even drop kicked it 
She says that she's not a whore, but she bangs like a shithouse door 
The aroma it lingers, it smells like fish fingers 
She stayed in Seattle, and went down on cattle 
It'd take a brontosaurus to eat her clitoris 

Shitty trail (It sucked!),
Shitty trail (It really sucked!),
The motherfuckers laid a shitty trail.
I would rather ______ than run that shitty trail.

We have virgins, we have virgins,
At our hash! At our hash!
Gonna get them fucked up, 
Gonna get them fucked up,
Up the ass!
Up the ass!
Bye Bye Cherry
Back your ass against the wall,
Here I come, balls and all,
Bye, bye cherry.
Won't your mother be disgusted,
When she sees your cherry busted,
Bye, bye cherry.
Wrap your legs around a little tighter,
Can't you see my load is getting lighter,
So! Shake that ass and wiggle your tits,
Until my little pecker spits,
Cherry, bye bye.

Lips / Face / Head
Lips? Who said lips? I’ll take some of that – on my zipper/clitoris!
Face? Who said face? She can sit on my anytime, and the line starts here.
Head? Who said head? I’ll take some of that. And I did. And it was good.
And there was MUCH rejoicing. And then we fucked.
We fucked for hours, uprooting trees and shrubs and flowers and shit.
Like Vikings, with horns on our heads. ARRRR.
And then she licked my asshole.
It wasn’t fun, it wasn’t funny, it was AWESOME.
So I’m taking my wife, my dog and my football and I’m going home.
So fuck you, you fucking fucks.

You Are My Hash Shit
You are my hash shit, the Osan hash shit
For being stupid on trail today,
I have to hold it, until I pass it,
Will someone please take my hashshit away.
Drink it down, down, down, down...

Fuck off, you wank, fuck off, you wank,
Fuck off, you wank, fuck off.
Fuck off, you wank, fuck off, you wank,
Fuck off, you wank, fuck off.

Hashy Birthday
Hashy birthday, fuck you,
Hashy birthday, fuck you,
Hashy birthday, you asshole,
Hashy birthday, fuck you.
And may you whore…

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